Te-Erika's Blog: Seriously Down And Out

I had a virtual lunch date yesterday. I posted some pictures of the steak I wish I was eating versus the pancakes I was actually eating and Google Plus invited me to share his ham sandwhich. I added the chips and there we go- A virtual lunch date!

It was the closest I've gotten to going out on a real date in FOREVER. Wait, I did meet a man a few weeks ago when I took myself out to dinner and we ended up spending the evening together and having a good time but, of course I lost interest when he sent me a text message a week later. I hate text conversations with men. Who am I kidding? I find ANY reason to reject men and it's really because I don't want to be with a man. The idea of it really disturbs me because I can't meet one that I respect.

On another front I had multiple interviews this week so the press is getting out about my project. To be honest, I am exhausted because I know it looks easy and that I'm just running the hell out of this blog but the amount of work and money that goes into organizing this plus marketing my project leaves me exhausted most days. I don't sleep well at night on my days off since I work overnight and during the day in between light naps, I try to do interviews and reach out to women to be featured and keep up with the news and I am always trying to discover new women to feature and new stories to tell. I am so exhausted.

I'm doing a good job, I think. This week alone, I got a few emails from women saying they had just found my site and they loved it. Sometimes I feel like I'm doing this all for nothing, this is definitely a lot of work on my part. Sure, the writing part comes easily to me, but organizing it and staying on top of all the emails and press releases that are sent to me is an overwhelming task. I send out my own press releases like 6 times a day whenever I can find a media outlet that I haven't reached yet. I do follow up phone calls and ask for partnerships with other blogs too.

Lately when people speak to me they describe me as 'down'. I want to scream at them- I AM SUPPOSED TO BE SLEEPING RIGHT NOW!!! But I can't. I'm not depressed. It's not that, or maybe it is, I don't know, but I am growing weary of all of this pressure I am putting on myself. Last week I was good, I mean, I had a great attitude, I wasn't tired and I was putting in the work with no hesitation. This week I feel like blah and I keep asking myself, "Why can't you have a normal life?"

Seriously, why can't I be like most people I meet who are phony and manipulative and petty? Why can't I just work a job and let that be that? The hard part is, the mere thought of working for someone else long term seems so WRONG to me. Kinda like not believing in God feels WRONG to Christians. Yeah, it's that serious.

Most of my interactions with people are disappointing and I am seriously starting to think why the hell am I pushing so hard to join them in this illusion of life? This is all so fake. The clothes, the houses, the jobs, seeking status and wealth. I know this, yet I keep trying to prove to myself that I CAN do it, but I'm not so sure I even want to anymore.

I can't stop being a help to people, it's a part of who I am. But as I grab moments of pleasure by taking myself out to dinner I wonder if any of this is worth it. But last week and this week were so different. Last week I gave up. I decided that it was okay not to be anything great and not to make myself a success. Once I 'gave up' I relaxed and had fun, this week I am back to pressuring myself again. So now I know what I'm doing wrong.

I'm tired, simply tired you guys but I LOVE doing this too so it's confusing to me too. Maybe I need a vacation or something. I have been going non stop since last year before I started The Rebuild Your Life Project and I'm just- just- tired.

Tonight my boys are here with me, they remind me that I am loved. I needed this. I really do. But tomorrow, its on and popping again- busting my brain to figure out different ways to market my site and my project in an effort to Rebuild My Life.

Don't feel sad for me, I'm just having one of those days where all I need is a tylenol and a hug. Thank goodness my sons are here.

Lata.

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Tyra Banks Earns Business Degree From Harvard

Photo credit: Tyra's Mom

Supermodel Tyra Banks announced via her Google Plus account that she earned her business degree from Harvard.

Tyra, the Emmy winning talk show host and Victoria's secret model is 39 years old and has already achieved the kind of success that dreams are made of yet she decided to dedicate her time to formal education.

Is formal education really important? In this day and age of access to an abundant amount of mass information, it is easy to teach yourself any skill. But, for the average person who needs accountability and direction, investing in a formal education is a better route. For the woman whose dream is to enter into corporate America and flourish, the more degrees you have, the better.

For My Savvy Sisters, who desire to become entrepreneurs, a formal education will likely earn you a spot in the company you desire to learn from so that you can imitate their successes and learn from their weaknesses when you begin to build your own company.

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"Ladies Who Cheat Are Not Real Women"

"Ladies who cheat are not real women and fellas who cheat are not real men." ~ quote from Essence Magazine article 8 Reasons Why I Would Never Cheat on My Wife by Paul Carrick Brunson.

I wholeheartedly disagree. This dude thinks he's better simply because he won't CHOOSE to cheat. Every decision is a choice. People who DON'T cheat, aren't interested in sleeping around. That's about it. It has nothing to do with being 'real' or being 'good'. It's their choice.

Those who cheat, love having multiple sexual partners. The person they are married to should understand that and accept it if they want to stay married.

If you first KNOW your partner's preference before you make a commitment to them and always allow them to be who they are- you will be much happier.

Cheating is not the worst thing a partner can do.

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My Savvy Sister of The Week- Kai Soremekun

Kai Soremekun's web series- CHICK is a call to women everywhere who want to release their inner superhero. In order for Kai to recognize her own superpowers, she had to embrace a series of twists and turns which allowed her to falter and get back up, ultimately strengthening her personality and skill set.

Her career in entertainment began as a dancer which quickly changed when she realized that a career as a dancer would be much like a career as an athlete- short. She switched her focus to acting and eventually realized her dream of being cast as a regular on a television show.

"I thought life would be all laughs and giggles once I'd made it as an actress. So when the show happened and I found myself unfulfilled it kind of freaked me out. I basically had to re-evaluate my entire life," Kai says. "I realized I wanted to have more creative control over the work I did. I needed my voice to be heard. I had things to say."

When the show was cancelled, Kai enrolled in film school and fell in love with directing. "I love crafting a story from the ground up and watching it evolve through the different stages of filmmaking," she says.

Although she had achieved what most women strive for- the ability to recognize her passion, Kai wasn't always so clear about her future. "When I was in high school my plan was to become a doctor like my dad. I took subjects like physics and biology and busted my ass trying to be good in those classes," Kai remembers. "But my final year in high school it hit me just how unhappy I was taking these subjects. They weren't fulfilling me and when I got really honest with myself I realized my plan to become a doctor was more to please my dad then to please me."

Instead of going straight to University, Kai decided to take a year off to figure out what she wanted to do. On a whim she auditioned for a performing arts academy based in New York City and was accepted. After this surprise kink in her plans she had a new dilemma- should she go to University or take a left turn and head to the big apple?

"My mom was the one who told me I should go to New York because if I didn't I would always wonder what if," Kai recalls. "That was a huge turning point for me but it also created my biggest obstacle which was believing I was talented and gifted as an artist. My entire upbringing had been geared towards academics, thinking analytically and approaching life in a very black and white way. It took me years to believe in myself as an artist."

Perseverance is what helped Kai overcome her mental block. She diligently honed her craft while challenging herself. The final step to overcome her self imposed obstacle was changing the voice in her head that kept berating her by telling her she wasn't talented and didn't offer anything of value being an artist.

Once she was able to change her perception of her own value, she began to fly. "I am a bit obsessed with my work at the moment because I am developing my project CHICK and it is still in the infant stage. I rarely work less than a ten hour day."

"I think realizing your greatness is very much connected to embracing your authentic self. The underlying theme of a lot of my work, and especially with CHICK, is about characters connecting with their true selves," Kai explains. "I really believe that when we embrace our true selves anything is possible. Often times our greatness and our purpose for being here are connected to things that don't fit into the norm category. It takes courage to step out of the safe, middle of the road lane and into the special lane made especially for us."

While Kai produces, stars in and directs her inspirational web series, CHICK, she also acts in commercials, television and does modeling gigs from time to time. She says unemployment gets her through the slow periods.

"I believe society conditions us to be sheep who follow blindly. It's easy to become robotic and follow the status quo without even thinking about the choices we're making. I also think in order for the world and the human species to evolve we have to work hard at fighting the urge to stay in this comfort zone. All the good stuff, all our brilliance and potential lies outside the box."




To learn more about Kai's inspirational web series watch the video and visit WhoIsChick.Com

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Posting A Ladies Night Pic On Facebook Doesn't Mean You're A Bad Employee

According a study done by the Northern Illinois University, the University of Evansville and Auburn University, your Facebook profile can indicate your ability to be successful at work.

Among their findings, they cited that someone posting a picture of themselves holding a beer, did not directly correlate to them being a bad employee.

READ MORE on Mashable.

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Ad Campaign Highlights Rise in Religious Skepticism Among African Americans

Amherst, New York – January 31, 2012 – African Americans for Humanism (AAH), a program of the Council for Secular Humanism that supports nonreligious African Americans, has launched a national multimedia advertising campaign showcasing religious skepticism in the African American community. Coinciding with Black History Month, the campaign features prominent African American humanists from history along with contemporary activists and organizers.

Ads began appearing January 30 and January 31 in New York City; Washington, DC; Los Angeles; Chicago; Atlanta; and Durham, North Carolina. On February 6, the campaign will be launched in Dallas. Advertisements will be placed on roadside billboards and in public transit sites. The Stiefel Freethought Foundation provided substantial creative and financial support for the campaign.

African Americans may be the most religious minority in the United States, but many feel that the churches don’t speak for them. AAH hopes that the campaign will bring attention to the presence of and increase in religious skepticism within the black community, encourage those who have doubts about religion to share their concerns and join other freethinkers in their local communities, and educate many about the history of black freethought.


All of the ads display the same message: “Doubts about religion? You’re one of many.” On the ads, images of writer-anthropologist Zora Neale Hurston, poet-activist Langston Hughes, and social reformer-publisher Frederick Douglass are paired with contemporary freethinkers. Representing their respective hometowns are activists leading the way for African American nonbelievers, including Mark D. Hatcher of the Secular Students at Howard University, Mandisa L. Thomas of of Black Nonbelievers, Inc. (Atlanta), Kimberly Veal of Black Nonbelievers of Chicago, Jamila Bey of African Americans for Humanism–Washington, DC, Veronique Matthews of the Triangle Freethought Society, Leighann Lord of the Center for Inquiry–Harlem, Alix Jules of the Dallas–Ft. Worth Coalition of Reason, and Sikivu Hutchinson of Black Skeptics Los Angeles.


“African Americans who question religion often feel rejected by religious family and friends, and by the greater black community,” said Debbie Goddard, director of AAH. “But there is a rich heritage of religious skepticism and humanism in black history. By featuring the historical faces as well as the modern in our ad campaign, we show people that questioning religion is not new and that there are many of us here.”

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Largest Women's Health Study Seeks 100,000 Nurses

Nurses' Health Study recruits "next generation"

BOSTON, Feb. 21, 2012 /PRNewswire-USNewswire/ -- From the dangers of tobacco and trans fats to the benefits of physical activity and whole grains, much of what we know about health today is thanks to the Nurses' Health Study.

Researchers are recruiting 100,000 nurses and nursing students to join the long-running Nurses' Health Study and expand its landmark research on women's health.

Female RNs, LPNs, and nursing students between the ages of 20 and 46 who live in the U.S. or Canada are eligible to join the study. More than 25,000 have signed up already, and recruitment will stay open until the goal of 100,000 participants is reached.

Researchers hope to engage a highly diverse group of women in the "next generation" of the study. For the first time, nursing students are eligible to enroll.

In order to make participation as convenient as possible for busy women, participants can join online and complete the study's surveys through a secure website, http://www.nhs3.org/.

More than 250,000 nurses have participated in the study since the 1970s. By completing confidential lifestyle surveys, they have helped advance medical knowledge about nutrition, exercise, cancer, heart disease, and many other conditions.

"Nurses were originally recruited for their expertise in accurately reporting health data," explains Dr. Walter Willett, the study's lead researcher and Chair of the Nutrition Department at Harvard School of Public Health in Boston, Mass. "Their involvement has been invaluable, and their dedication is remarkable—an astounding 90% of them are still enrolled, decades later! The new group, NHS3, will allow us understand how today's lifestyle and environment affect a woman's health in the future."

Nurses enrolled in the earlier studies are encouraging their daughters and younger colleagues to join. "My mom started filling out surveys when the study began," one nurse recently commented on the NHS3 Facebook page (www.facebook.com/NHS3.org). "I am so proud to be part of this study and see what it has done."

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Haiti Could Receive First Cruise Ship in a Quarter of a Century

Haiti's Minister of the Interior welcomes potential initiative to bring Cruise with a Cause, which combines tourism and volunteer work. Port-Au-Prince is getting ready for the historic visit.

PORT-AU-PRINCE, Haiti, Feb. 20, 2012 /PRNewswire/ -- A cruise ship may soon call at Port-Au-Prince, the first such visit in Haiti after a quarter of a century, a milestone that Minister of the Interior Thierry Mayard-Paul welcomed Friday at a gathering in Tuscaloosa, Alabama with the organizers of the cruise that combines tourism with volunteer work, seeing this as another instance of sustainable development for the Caribbean nation's economy, "breathing new life" into the tourism sector.

"Haiti is at a turning point as a nation," Mr. Mayard-Paul said at the retreat of Praisefest Ministries, which throughout the year organizes "Cruise with a Cause," a series of Mission Cruises transporting volunteer workers to various places that are in need of support. Praisefest Ministries is looking into taking their experience to Haiti via a 4,000 person Cruise with a Cause in 2013. The passengers on this cruise would participate in projects that include building homes, repairing schools, and installing new water purification systems throughout Port-au-Prince.

"When you sail into Port-au-Prince, my friends, you will be making history," the minister said. "Yours will be the first cruise ship to visit our capital in a quarter of a century: This will be a milestone to remember, so let me thank you now for breathing new life into our tourism sector."

The Government of Haiti has made this project a priority and is diligently working to evaluate and prepare the port in the capital city of Port-au-Prince for the cruise ship's arrival, said Mr. Mayard-Paul, one of the chief architects of President Michel Martelly's policy for job-creation and economic progress through local initiatives and decentralized cooperation.

Praisefest Ministries, the non-profit group that organizes Cruises with a Cause, include pastors and church representatives that give the group access to millions of homes and over 60,000 churches, with members willing to get involved with work in Haiti and the potential that they may return to the Caribbean nation in future cruises and visits.

"The goal here is to get these organizations to adopt the communities they serve in. They will continue to resource and help develop these communities in the years ahead," stated Dr. Matthew Dunaway of Praisefest Cruise with a Cause.

Tourism, one of the strongest and growing industries in the Caribbean, is a key to this plan's success in a country naturally endowed with paradisaical beaches and a people renowned for their hospitality. Dr. Dunaway recognizes the potential tourism has in Haiti's economic development, "We will continue to bring these efforts to Haiti setting the stage for tourism in the future to bring income."

"Haitian men and women are not looking for a hand out, but for a hand up… and this is what you will be bringing to Haiti, a powerful and loving hand up," Mr. Mayard-Paul told the Praisefest Ministries gathering.

During his visit to Alabama, Mr. Mayard-Paul with over 100 representatives from dozens of churches in the United States to discuss the potential and the opportunity that the arrival of the cruise ship would represent to his country.

He is also highlighting the benefit that this kind of organization provides to countries such as his own that are looking to change their economy from sustaining to sustainable. Mr. Mayard-Paul said the administration's plan for Haiti's development is based on laying out the framework for the country's economy to take off on its own, as it progresses in its reconstruction efforts after the January 2010 earthquake.

He invoked the proverb that says, "Give a man a fish, and you feed him for a day. Give a man a fishing pole and teach him to fish, and he can feed himself and others for a lifetime."

That was the difference, Mr. Mayard-Paul said, between the cooperation-based initiative of Cruise with a Cause by Praisefest Ministries and that of other agencies or non-governmental organizations, that "do their work and then they leave."

"What you are doing is more powerful... It is people to people, and what you bring to Haiti will endure," he said, addressing the Praisefest Ministries' leaders and members.

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