Create Your Own Adventure

Are you ready to spice up your life? There's only one sure-fire way. It's a secret.

How To Find Answers To All of Life's Questions

Do you want wisdom? There are 3 ways to find it.

Review: Vicky Christina Barcelona (2008)

Vicky Christina Barcelona weaves a tale of transformation of two besties who visit Barcelona for the summer unaware that the trip will challenge their current belief systems.

Survival Series: How To Survive A First Date

If you're ready to begin dating again, you'll need to know these mental strategies to make the most of it.

Where Is My Success?

Have you been toiling away for years and don't see any rewards?

Saturday, April 2, 2011

Taking Back America, One Local Economy at a Time


By Christina Fermin

Politics & Society Columnist

The economy is looking grim as the value of the dollar continues to fall and unemployment remains stagnant. The only growth in employment is in the service sector, which are usually low wage jobs. With the future of the united States of America uncertain and the future of the economy looking grim, we must begin to focus locally. Building local decentralized economies will save communities from the turbulent days that lay ahead.

Building a local economy and focusing locally will assistant yourself and your community through these tumultuous times. As unemployment benefits end, food prices soar, gas prices soar and the future of our country is unknown, pulling together and localizing will help one another cope and survive. Before globalization, the centralization of the economy, politics and banking our country did very well. When things were decentralized communities and people flourished.

Focusing locally is good for our environment, lowers our carbon footprint, makes us less reliant on vehicles and diversifies the economy. It allows for a variety of employment opportunities, a richer quality of life, safer neighborhoods and self-sufficiency. Becoming self-sufficient is one of the most important markers we as a civilization must meet if we are to continue as a species. As the planet goes through catastrophic changes which are altering landscapes and coasts we are going to realize even more how devastating it is to rely on goods that come from far away places.

Food prices are rising and hunger are the primary cause of death in many developing nations. It makes sense to begin a community garden and/or start our own small gardens. As gas prices begin to rise many people seek alternative transportation such as car pooling, biking or public transportation. As budget cuts begin hitting local cities, towns and communities the prospect of having a strong local economy will allow easier access to goods more if you have to walk. As the local economy begins to grow it will help diversify the economy and businesses will begin hiring.

We are advancing into a more technologically advanced society with technology satisfying the demands people were once held accountable for. With this new “free time” we can concentrate locally and within, allowing for a more harmonious, synchronistic society. As we concentrate locally we begin to gain the power back from big business and large corporations, defeating the elite stronghold one city, one town, one community at a time. Why are we giving our economy away to China or multinational corporations? Focusing locally will take that power away from other interests and place it into the hands of the people.

So what can you do? It begins with you. Take part in your local elections, town hall meetings and make your voice heard. Start a community garden or start purchasing from one that is in your area, search here http://www.communitygarden.org/.

Start purchasing your furniture and clothing and other goods from local stores, thrift stores and yard sales. Start a local community reporting blog, aim for sustainable and self-sufficiency. As the united States of America plunges into more debt, inflation begins and unemployment rises focusing locally will assist you and your neighbors meet the demands and needs while the Federal government, Wallstreet and global economies play out the drama they have created. Change comes from the bottom up, we have seen the damage of top down leadership and it does not work.

Peace & Harmony,

Christina

About the Columnist

With a bachelors degree in political science from Florida Atlantic University, Christina Fermin has always cultivated her love for history, politics, sociology, ancient knowledge and teachings, the outdoors, the ocean and the environment. Christina strives to make our world better by helping us all create a new reality and understanding of all taking place here and now.

COUNTDOWN: 8 Days


The Rebuild Your Life Project begins in 8 days. How am I feeling?

Like a BEAST!

I should be nervous and scared but I am not. I've come to learn that whenever my life shifts, it's a gift.

The crazy part is going through all of my clothes and things and putting them into piles. There are only two piles: give-away and throw away.

Goodbye old college sweatshirts. Good bye t-shirts I collected over the years. Goodbye to my favorite dresses, accessories, hats, shoes and jeans. Everything goes. Nothing stays.

Everything that represents my past will be a distant memory and that's okay. Those things do not define me.

Goodbye.

Goodbye.

Goodbye old life.

Goodbye.

Friday, April 1, 2011

REBUILD: Trying To Gather Support

I've been out and about in the community telling people about The Rebuild Your Life Project and My Savvy Sisters. So far, everyone I've told has been amazed by what I am doing. The women I give my flier to thank me for putting together a website like this and I tell them, "Check it out, it will give you the inner strength you need to survive."

So far, no one has pledged to donate anything but I do have one supporter who will be coming to speak on my behalf at an event. In calling around trying to get speaking engagements about it I'm not having much luck. They are either not returning my phone calls or telling me that they do not give space away for free and that they can't help me market this event. So, I only have one place who is willing to let me speak so far.

I am glad that the National Coalition to End Homelessness has decided to officially support this endeavor. I spoke with Laura, one of the Board of Directors and she promised to support.

The only glitch I am having right now is I'm waiting to speak with Eric Brown who is in charge of the community centers in Broward county. He is an awesome man who took me around and introduced me to the directors of each center. He offered me the use of one of the centers for this project and when I pitched the dates for the job fair, he said there was a glitch and he would get back to me.

I can not begin organizing this properly without a date so I have been waiting all week to hear back from him. Hopefully, he'll call me today with a firm date so that I can move forward.

In the meantime- I HAVE NO FEAR.

I know that the right people and places will come into my life. The right opportunities will too. I have been reaching out to the newspapers and radio stations to offer to write about my project as I go along and no one has contacted me back. I keep calling and writing but it seems that no one is interested in hearing about it or paying me to write about it, which is odd since I am a journalist and I CAN write and have written for many of the publications in this area.

I'm not the BEST at everything but there are some things I do well. One is speaking, the other is organizing. I do have a no nonsense way of going about things though. If you really need a smile and soft kisses to motivate you, you probably won't like working with me. When I'm in my zone I'm just ON IT and delegating and making decisions and asking for what I need without flinching and I expect it to be delivered.

I don't know what's going to become of all of this but I do know that I have been putting in my end of the bargain. I am doing the WORK required to make this a success. I am doing what is necessary and not pulling any punches or taking any shortcuts so the rest is up to the Universe. I am doing my part. All I can do is put in the work and ask for the opportunity. The WRONG people will be repelled and the RIGHT people will take part. I trust that.

I plan to use mostly Kanye West songs in my videos because his music inspires me and I think he has an awesome spirit. Ok. Ok. He's been my imaginary boyfriend for about 5 years now and I'd like to think we are taking this journey together. His music is really the soundtrack for my life.

I'm hoping that great people will be magnetized toward me and I promise you, everyday I fantasize about all the good I'll do and how I'm going to be a blessing to others one day. It's my heart and my mission.

Confession: I Slept With My Boss

Sometimes My Savvy Sisters aren't perfect. Sometimes My Savvy Sisters break the rules. Sometimes, we need a confessional to release the guilt. This is just the place for it too.



Confession: I Slept With My Boss

I slept with my boss twice and I plan to do it again. He's not married but I am. And yes, it was great!


For My Savvy Sisters: Do you have something you need to confess and let go of? Submit your confession to confessions@mysavvysisters.com and we'll post your confession anonymously. Don't worry, we don't judge and we will never tell.

Thursday, March 31, 2011

Blog Carnival 5 - Resources For Women


A Blog Carnival is an event for bloggers to share their writing and expose their blogs across the blogosphere. Today My Savvy Sisters hosts its 5th Blog Carnival. Submissions were sent in from bloggers sharing their expertise and inspiration on different topics just for women. Peruse the blog posts and enjoy!

Abby Nelson presents Counseling the Childless – How it Works posted at Masters In Counseling.

Laura A. Wright presents Writer! How Can You Relate to Web Design? posted at Masters in Computer Science.

Michelle Young presents Children and Food – When They Refuse to Eat posted at Masters in Nursing.

Kristin Marshall presents Friend Friday: Blogging Lessons posted at Relatively Chic.

Virginia W presents "You Did WHAT With Your Placenta?!" posted at Stay-At-Home-Momologues.

Aparna presents 5 Quick Steps To A Slimmer and More Graceful You posted at Beauty and Personal Grooming.

How To Survive- Getting Fired From Your Job

"We're going to have to let you go," they tell you and your heart skips a beat.

You immediately think of all the bills you have and the debt you're in and you imagine being kicked out onto the street and living on the sidewalk.

You rush home in tears, frantically grabbing your laptop to polish up your resume so that you can begin your job search.

Before you do that- WAIT!

You were fired from your job, you weren't sentenced to the death penalty. Your life is not over. In fact, this is a new beginning.

Consider this:

You were fired from your job and you probably didn't like working there anyway or else you would have been performing so well that they would have considered it a truly significant loss to let you go.

You may have been secretly harboring a desire to move forward in life in a new direction. Wishes DO come true and sometimes these type of wishes will mean you have to lose what you have to gain what you really want.

Everything in life is only for a season. You did not fail. Your season at that particular place of employment is now over. You have learned the lessons that you needed to learn and you are free to go and grow.

You need a break. Rushing out and trying to frantically find another job will not work. Sit still. Take a few days with no action and listen to your intuition. Search your heart. You have freedom now, you can write the next story of your life with your next decision. Where do you really want to be?

You may be eligible for unemployment. While this source of income isn't permanent or nearly enough to take care of all of your bills, you are savvy enough to make it work while it lasts.

It is important to understand that your peace of mind precedes your peace in life. Stability is an illusion. Your worth is not tied to what you own or any income a job could offer. Your peace of mind and faith will lead you toward your new direction.

What you must do:

Apply for unemployment.

Be still.

Listen to your intuition. What is it saying? What have you been wanting to do that your job held you back from doing? Recognize it. Make a plan. Go do it.

Get excited! You have a whole new leg of your journey ahead of you. No, you have not failed. No, you have not lost your purpose. No, you will not be in this place for the rest of your life. No, you are not a loser.

You lost your job. It's a JOB. Millions of people have jobs. There are more opportunities for you out there. While you calmly search for your next opportunity, open your inner ears to hear your direction and begin to do the things that you LOVE to do.

You can't rush the process, you can only be diligent with your efforts. You will not lose. Even if you have to move out of your current residence this will only open the door for a new adventure.

You are more than loved and more than capable of figuring out your next step. Your pen is poised. You have what it takes to succeed.

In the meantime, enjoy yourself. Sleep in. Go to the beach to watch the sunrise. Take a trip. Go have a drink in the middle of the week. Spend time with your family. Have everyone take a day off and enjoy a 3 day weekend together.

It is through enjoying the pleasures of life that you maintain a calm countenance that will allow you to hear your inner guidance whisper that necessary steps to find your way.

Relax.

Everything is taken care of.

This was planned.

This has purpose.

You better go out and enjoy this time because when your next opportunity comes for work, you are going to go at it with much more intensity than you've ever done before and you may not get another break like this for YEARS.

Rest up, your REAL life work is just around the corner.


***For EXTRA INSPIRATION- check out
The Rebuild Your Life Project, an empowerment outreach that teaches women how to survive their biggest failures. There is even a video documentary that you can watch HERE.

5 Things You Never Want To Hear Your Child Say


Kids. You can't live with them, you can't lock in the basement until they're 21 either. You have to roll with the punches as you realize that these little people you pushed out of a little hole have minds of their own.

Here are 5 Things You Never Want To Hear Your Child Say

1. I swallowed it.
2. I hate you.
3. You said it was your special toy so I took it to school to show my friends.
4. Why was daddy on top of you?
5. I'm pregnant.





For My Savvy Sisters: Can you add to this list? Leave a comment!

Evictions: Know The Law

Are you facing an eviction? How did your landlord let you know? What are your rights? What can you do to ensure the process is fair?

We have compiled the best resources for tenant/landlord laws from the U.S. and Canada. Empower yourself.


Wikipedia details state eviction law, BC Canada & California laws pertaining to tenant-landlord rights, related links.

Forums with discussions regarding eviction notices, lease agreements, roommates, noisy neighbors and related tenant concerns.

Canada laws concerning tenant and landlord agreements.

Landlord Tenant Law Director

General advice for tenants facing eviction including issues related to nonpayment of rent, lease violations, health & safety concerns, bankruptcy, filing a counter claim and tips on eviction court procedures.

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Senator Collins and Colleagues Introduce Bipartisan Bill To Create National Women’s History Museum

WASHINGTON, D.C. - U.S. Senators Susan Collins, R-Me., and Barbara Mikulski, D-Md., along with Senators Barbara Boxer, D-Calif., and Kay Bailey Hutchison, R-Tex., introduced legislation today to pave the way for a National Women's History museum on a site near the National Mall in Washington, D.C. The land is owned by the General Services Administration (GSA) and would be bought by the National Women's History Museum, Inc. (NWHM) at a fair market value price. A companion House measure by U.S. Rep. Carolyn Maloney, D-N.Y., was also introduced today.

The bill directs the GSA to enter into a long-term occupancy agreement with the NWHM, a nonprofit, nonpartisan educational institution, to develop the site at 12th Street and Independence Avenue, SW.

"A women's history museum is long overdue in the nation's capital," said Senator Collins. "It would be the first institution in the region that showcases the many important social, economic, cultural, and political contributions that women have made to our country."

"The museum would help ensure that future generations understand what we owe to the many generations of American women that helped build, sustain, and advance our society. It is a great use for an empty lot on our National Mall, and it makes good fiscal sense," Senator Collins said.

It is important to note that taxpayers will not shoulder the funding of this project. The proposed legislation calls for no new federal program and no new claims on the budget. The bill would simply direct the General Services Administration to negotiate and enter into an occupancy agreement with the National Women's History Museum, Inc. to establish a museum on a tract of land near the Smithsonian Museums, close to the National Mall.

"In fact, the Museum would be putting dollars in the federal government's pocket in order to occupy this space because the transaction would be at fair market value. This bill would be a win-win for the taxpayers and the Museum," Senator Collins said.

"The National Women's History Museum will honor the mothers of our country and the unique contributions women have made to America since its beginning," said Senator Mikulski. "It will pay respect to all the forgotten women who have served this country. Women's roles in history are often overlooked and undervalued. But we have shaped, and continue to shape, society - not only in terms of battles fought and won - but through great social movements. The history of women in America is inspiring. Women were the driving force behind the abolitionists, who helped end slavery and fought for the 14th Amendment. And of course, women led the suffragist movement, which sought to curb domestic violence by ending drinking and gave women control of their lives with the right to vote. The list goes on and on - and it is still growing. One way to honor their courage and hard work is through this museum. Another is to carry on their legacy. I vow to do just that. "

"The fabric of our country's rich history has been woven by generations of courageous women who continually made history as they broke down barriers, redefined what is possible, and left future generations with a greater country than the one they had known. It is important that we have a women's history museum, so all Americans and visitors from around the world can learn more about the inspiring women who have helped build our country," said Senator Hutchison.

Under Senator Collins' bill, the National Women's History Museum organization would be completely responsible for the design and construction of the museum. It is estimated that such a museum would draw more than 1.5 million visitors to the nation's capital each year.

We Need Resource Testers

In every major city there are agencies that claim to support women and to empower them. We aim to test out these resources and report on which are actually useful and which agencies aren't.

We are looking for Resource Testers from every city and every country. If you are interested in being a Resource Tester to represent your city and can write a report on your experiences, please do contact our Executive Assistant and she will provide you with the guidelines.

Your World News Report - March 30, 2011


Berlyne Julmis

News Coordinator



The United States In Libya

President Obama addressed the nation on Monday night regarding the United States actions in Libya.

The president deemed it was necessary to send in military support to revolutionize Gadhafi’s inhumane and deadly attacks. The president declared in his address to the nation, “When America’s values and interests are at stake, we must act” giving the American people reason why military actions were needed in Libya. Thus at this time, President Obama is confident that US objective has been met and The United States will condense its position to a “supporting role.”

Read More http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/42311273/ns/politics/

Wal-Mart Versus Women

The Supreme Court is due to decide whether the case against Wal-Mart in its alleged gender discrimination suit should advance to a class action lawsuit. In 2001 six women initiated a joint lawsuit against the conglomerate retailer claiming inequitable wages-- many female employees have since joined the suit and have reaffirmed the claims. If the ruling favors Wal-Mart’s female employees the company will be obligated to disburse billions of dollars. Seeing as Wal-Mart is the largest retailer in the world the outcome of this case will set precedence on how companies in the US can structure salaries. The ruling on this case is set to be determined in June.

Read More


Fire Blazing at Miami International Airport

Nearly a week after the blazing fire at Miami International Airport, passenger travel plans are still being affected. Airlines have been forced to cancel numerous flights leaving passengers in disarray. The airport fuel pump operations are currently out of commission but officials for the airport predict this problem will be resolved by early next week.

Read More


Syria: The People Have Spoken

The Syrian government has been removed by President Bashar Assad after the Syrian people marched in numbers into the streets demanding the government to step down. The citizen of Syria wants democratic reform and has demanded that the president heed to their demand. On Tuesday, a spoke woman for President Bashar Assad has announced a new cabinet will take power on Wednesday March 30.

Read More

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

REBUILD: Releasing All Fear


I'm losing all fear of going through with this project.

My fear was based on not knowing if it will work or if it will be embraced or if it will actually help anyone but now I'm thinking, THIS IS WHAT I WAS BORN TO DO!

No, not be homeless, but, to do the things that I am doing.

Since leaving graduate school and losing both of my jobs and losing my car and losing a couple of friends I have started my own business- My Savvy Sisters.Com.

Everyday I wake up and I do interviews and I market this site and I reach out to people and I do research and every night I fall asleep smiling.

Since I've started this project every day I am brainstorming and I'm reaching out to community leaders and I'm organizing and everyday my life is filled with purpose and promise.

I get to film videos and edit them and showcase them and people write to me everyday for help and I have the ability to help through my inspirational writing and knowledge of resources.

I think I am MORE than capable of handling this project. I think I was BORN to do this!

No more being sad, unless I feel like it.

No more worrying about people joining in.

From now on I believe that the RIGHT people will come into my life and will be magnetized to this project and ME.

The wrong people will wrinkle their noses and frown. I don't want those kind of people in my life anyway.

Here is my latest video. Of course, there's more to come. I am approaching this project with an inner strength and the expectation that this will be the force that propels me toward my dream of living my TODAY, every single day.

I want life to stay JUST LIKE THIS. Wait, except I want a stable home and lots of food and hugs, but the rest of my activities, I want to remain the same.


A Letter From Your Abuser

Dear Reader, You've chosen to read this article because you or someone you know has been abused. Whether it was yesterday, last year or decades ago the pain may still be lingering. You are confused as to why this happened to you and you need an answer. Please do read this letter from an abuser and pass it along if you must. All my blessings to you in hopes that through these words you find the relief and comfort that you seek.

Love,

Te-Erika





Hello.

I am writing this letter to try to explain myself. I'm not sure if I can ever make up for what I did to you but believe me, it haunts me everyday. I am not perfect nor do I pretend to be, but what I do know is, if I had the chance to do everything over again, I would have hugged you instead of hurting you.


See, when I saw you I saw a light so bright that I couldn't ignore. You, in all your brilliance made me want to be as close to you as possible. I wanted to know you. I wanted to be with you. I wanted all of these things and I had no clue how to get them and I didn't think I deserved them. I lashed out at you because I thought you would never see me the way I see you. I hurt you because I was hurting. I wanted to show you love but I don't know how to give that. Love was never given to me. Not in a good way anyway. Sometimes I feel evil knowing that I did what I did to you. I hated when it was done to me and then I turned around and did the same thing.


Sometimes I feel like hell would be too good for me, but then again I wish for hell because the pain of the fire would be a constant reminder of the pain I live with everyday knowing how much I hurt you.
I tried to be the best I could but life didn't allow it. I could offer a thousands reasons why I did what I did. I could blame the world or tell you that you deserved it but really, you didn't. You didn't deserve what I did to you. If you could see the truth of my heart you would see that I did love you. I know it's a crazy and twisted thing to say because I didn't show it properly but I don't know how. I still don't.

What happened had nothing to do with you. You did nothing wrong. I know my words were like lashes to you. Please let it go. They meant nothing. Everything I said was really how I felt about myself. I wanted you to feel what I was feeling. I wanted you to be like me because I know I could never be like you. I don't want to be alone in this pain. I tried to drag you with me.


If I could give you what you deserve you would be clothed in the finest garments and adorned with jewelry and you would always have the biggest piece of cake. You were so wonderful to me but I didn't handle you with care. I didn't know what to do with you. Your light shines so brightly that it was hard for me to even look at you. Why didn't I have a chance to shine like you? Why were you so lucky?


I am sorry. I am sorry for what I did to you. I am sorry that I made you cry. I am sorry that I took away your trust. Please don't blame everyone for what I did to you. I'm all messed up. I didn't get it right. It doesn't mean that there isn't someone else who can love you the way you deserve to be loved.

I am sorry.
I am so sorry.

Please forgive me and move forward. Don't let my stupidity hold you back from shining the way you were meant to shine. You are such perfection to me. Don't let me take that away from you. I don't deserve that much power in your life. I am nothing. I mean nothing. I am insignificant.


I am sorry.
Please forgive me... and forget me because I'll vanish if you do and I will never reappear again.

Regretfully,


You Know Who

Why Does My Body Produce Offensive Odors?

Have you ever wondered-Why do my armpits and crotch produce such a strong smell?

The answer is simple. Back in our most primitive days of existence, the body odor emitted through our arm pits and crotch were used as a defense mechanism to ward off wild animals while we were hunting and gathering.

When we were in danger, our body produced more heat and this scent magnified. This scent magnifies when we allow the hair in our armpits and on our private parts to grow. This is precisely the reason why hair grows "down there." It was useful to help magnify that odor during attacks.

The best way to reduce this odor is to shave the hair off and use deodorant. For those with more intense body heat brought on by stress or physical activities, after putting on your panties, trace the outline of your panties with deodorant. This will reduce the odor from your private area significantly.

About Deodorant

We use deodorant to mask our natural body odor, but most commercial deodorants have toxic chemicals like parabens, propylene glycol and aluminum. These chemicals are extremely harmful to our bodies.

There are alternatives to commercial deodorants. In fact, if you want to, you can create deodorant yourself. If you don't have time to learn how to make your own body care products, you can purchase natural body care products similar to these:



Savvy Blogger We Love- Rita Arens

Rita Arens

Age 37

Kansas City


Rita Arens is the assignment and syndication editor for BlogHer.com, a vibrant community of women bloggers. She began her blog, Surrender Dorothy, when she was on maternity leave in 2004. By blogging, editing and writing her first young adult novel, Rita has put to use her graduate education in writing and love for the written word by amusing readers of all ages.

“I had been actively writing short stories and poetry until I was blindsided by motherhood.” Rita said. “Blogging seemed like a good way to keep writing and also connect with other moms. And it was!”

Although she said she tries to provide writing more than information, she experiments with forms from essays to anecdotes to humor to political rants. “I try to switch it up a few times a week depending on my mood and what’s going on in the world. My categories include the publishing industry, parenting, relationships, healthcare, eating disorders, general frivolity, home improvement and a humor segment I did for a while with my daughter called Paging Dr. Arens.”

As the result of her easy-going writing style and wit, she landed her job at BlogHer as well as several speaking engagements and a parenting anthology. “My professional life has been changed 100%. My personal life is pretty much the same. I do not win friends and influence people at my daughter’s elementary school with my blog,” Rita joked.

Blogging seems to run in the family, Rita’s sisters is the mastermind behind Tales From Clarkstreet and their parents read both of their blogs to keep up with their lives.

“I’m not sure what my in-laws think,” Rita admitted. “But they already know I’m odd. My husband sort of knew what he was getting into when he married me. My daughter has grown up knowing I had a blog and wrote about her, so it’s been a way of life for her. She likes the fact she is in my book and used to beg to sit on my lap and hand me books to sign when we did local publicity for Sleep Is for the Weak, which won a 2009 gold award from the National Parenting Publications Association (NAPPA). My daughter would think it was weird if I didn’t write about her at this juncture."

Go ahead and allow yourself a treat today. Visit Surrender Dorothy, by the blogger from Kansas who makes it cool to laugh at yourself.

Where Is My Success?

You may be frustrated right now. You've been on your grind for years and you still haven't reaped the harvest of all of the seeds you've sown.

You've cried, you've sacrificed, you've stood firm, you've believed yet, you still seem to be spinning your wheels. You're a good person. You know it. You have helped others and invested in your own success for so long.

"Where is my success?" you ask. "How much longer will I continue to toil?"

You can't reap the harvest in the same season that you plant it, my darling. Your version of success takes time if you want to hold on to it. Many one-hit wonders have stumbled onto success but couldn't sustain it because they were not prepared for their luck. Right now you are building your creative and intellectual muscles. You're gaining the strength you need to stand tall and win.

Do not believe for a moment that your success is being withheld from you. In fact, you are successful because you haven't given up on your dream.

Along your way to your success there are several tools that you need to pick up in order to build. Yes, you may have to take jobs you don't like in order to survive but in those cases, each position offered to you is a training ground for you to soak in vast amounts of knowledge. What are they doing correctly? What are they not doing correctly?

Pay attention. Walk around. Listen. These are the tools and lessons you need to set a firm foundation for your dream.

When it is time for you to move on to your next training ground something will happen to push you there. You may become disheartened by the work you do or you may get fired. It could be something as simple as, you begin to yearn for more so you seek another opportunity and it is handed to you.

Do not be caught up in frustration simply because you are not where you thought you should be. Your expectations for your future do not compare to what is in store for you if you keep plugging away and listening and responding to your intuition.

You are being guided. Stop trying to flip to the end of the book. Go slowly through each page and relish the story as it unfolds. You're okay. Your success is imminent.

Collect your tools and set yourself up for a firm foundation and one day, one glorious day, you will find yourself in the midst of a beautiful transformation right into the heart of your most treasured dream.

I promise.

Monday, March 28, 2011

Texas Children's Fetal Center Successfully Performs Open Fetal Surgery to Treat Congenital Lung Malformations


HOUSTON, March 28, 2011 /PRNewswire-USNewswire/ -- Experts from Texas Children's Fetal Center published a study that appears in volume 46, issue 2 of the Journal of Pediatric Surgery documenting the first successful cases of open fetal surgery to treat fetal lung malformations in the Southern U.S. The study also provides improved data to diagnose, assess, predict risk, and recommend treatment for fetal lung lesions.

Lung tumors are infrequent and difficult to treat in unborn babies, and until recently, open fetal surgery in these cases has rarely been successful. Joining the ranks of Children's Hospital of Philadelphia (CHOP) and University of California San Francisco (UCSF), Texas Children's Hospital documented successful cases of open fetal surgery for lung masses in hydropic fetuses during this study, an achievement that confirms the potential for more lives to be saved in-utero.

"Our documentation of open fetal surgery results is particularly noteworthy, and I'm proud of all the work that was done by our Fetal Center team in order to publish this manuscript," said Darrell Cass, M.D., corresponding author on the study, co-director of Texas Children's Fetal Center and associate professor, departments of Surgery, Pediatrics and Obstetrics and Gynecology at Baylor College of Medicine. "Thanks to advancements in fetal medicine, what was previously a grim diagnosis is now operable and there is hope for these babies to lead a healthy life."

The study also improved the method used to assess fetal lung lesions and determine the best candidates for open fetal surgery. A formula known as congenital cystic adenomatoid malformation-volume-ratio (CVR) was previously developed at CHOP and has since been used by a few centers to evaluate patients. The formula correlates prenatal diagnostic features with fetal and postnatal outcomes. However, up until this point, there was little data validating its use in other centers. By reviewing a relatively large series of fetuses with lung masses, Texas Children's Fetal Center was able to refine the use of CVR, and refine the precise cutoff point for identifying high-risk patients.

"This paper gives us, as a medical community, a better understanding of CVR and helps us to re-think the way we use it to predict outcomes," said Dr. Cass.

Future patients in fetal centers across the country will now be properly evaluated by using CVR and the new cutoff point that Texas Children's Hospital experts have established. Since the risks and chance of success will be determined ahead of time, doctors will know whether open fetal surgery is an optimal choice, and more lives can potentially be saved with these techniques.

The study was conducted by Darrell L. Cass, M.D.; Oluyinka O. Olutoye, M.D.; Christopher I. Cassady, M.D.; Kenneth J. Moise, M.D., Anthony Johnson, D.O.; Ramesha Papanna, M.D.; David A. Lazar, M.D.;Nancy A. Ayres, M.D.; and Bella Belleza-Bascon, R.N., and was based on 82 fetuses evaluated for lung masses at Texas Children's Fetal Center between July 2001 and May 2010. It is the most comprehensive evaluation of CVR to-date.

The complete study, called "Prenatal diagnosis and outcome of fetal lung masses" can be found in the February edition of the Journal of Pediatric Surgery.

The Great Ponzi Scheme of the 21st Century


By Christina Fermin

Society & Politics Columnist

A ponzi scheme is a fraudulent investment operation who uses investors money to fake profits. Such was the case with Bernie Madoff, an investment advisor who was sentenced in 2009 to 150 years in prison for swindling investors and lying about billions of dollars in profits. To understand what has happened to our country you must look at the relationship of Corporations, Wallstreet, Lobbyists, Politicians and Banking. The Great Ponzi scheme of the 21st century could not have happened without their cooperation. The entire system has not only been compromised but it has been bought out. The corruption is bursting through the seams with more dirty laundry waiting to be aired. To help understand this, please check out this explanation from MSNBC.





The wealthiest of the elite has slowly and more recently removed the vast amounts of wealth the American middle class once held. Take a look at the Troubled Asset Relief Program of 2008 where the government purchased toxic equity and assets from financial institutions who knowingly participated in predatory lending. The government handed over $700 billion dollars to the financial industry without reforms or conditions at the expense of us the American taxpayer. Remember these large too big to fail institutions knew of the con and the risks, they also knew they had government to bail them out when the bubble burst.


As I mentioned in a previous column, filmmaker Michael Moore stated that there are 400 people in the United States that hold more wealth, stock and property than 155 million people combined. Up until Jimmy Carter there were numerous Presidents, including John F. Kennedy, Lyndon B. Johnson and Dwight D. Eisenhower, who have warned the American public about the wealthy elite trying to take control of governments and financial institutions as well as the military industrial complex. Take a minute to think about that. Statistics show less than 1% of the population controls over 90% of the wealth on the planet.


It is the agenda of these people to keep us ignorant, entertained and preoccupied, because if we had the time to analyze and think about ourselves and our society, change would be made. So what can you do? Start by removing your money from these institutions like Bank of America, Chase, Wellsfargo, Citibank, Wachovia, Goldman Sachs (or any bank who took TARP funds) and deposit it at a credit union or local bank. Educate yourself, there is a treasure trove of information on the web to help you understand what is going on. Knowledge is power, educate yourself, read the Constitution for the united States of America, know and understand it.


Say no to war and join in on a protest. Stop voting for democrat or republican affiliates because they both work for the same people. Erase the lines of division that we have created for ourselves. In unity it is time to recognize that we are one human family and collectively we can bring an end to their reign of destruction and create a better world free from oppression, slavery, poverty, division, destruction and pollution. Exercise your free will because it begins with you. Love yourself and one another because it is time to reclaim our lives, our future and our individual sovereignty.

Peace & Harmony,

Christina

About the Columnist

With a bachelors degree in political science from Florida Atlantic University, Christina Fermin has always cultivated her love for history, politics, sociology, ancient knowledge and teachings, the outdoors, the ocean and the environment. Christina strives to make our world better by helping us all create a new reality and understanding of all taking place here and now.

Spiritual Abuse Survivor: Erika's Story

Erika Martin is 34-years-old and lives in Ferrisburg, Vermont. She is a work-at-home mom and an artist who has been married to her husband David, for 14 years. Erika shares her story of spiritual abuse with My Savvy Sisters in hopes that someone will recognize themselves and find the courage to walk away and heal.


Erika’s Story

My parents started home-schooling and living the patriarchal lifestyle when I was 14 years old. Before that, we were a normal family with 4 kids in public school, my parents both worked in the bakery they owned, and we were involved in the youth group at church. My sister and I were involved in some of the extra activities at the local high school, namely FHA (Future homemakers of America). I played on the basketball team and had just finished my freshman year of high school as the class president. I was pretty much an ‘A’ student and was socially active. The summer after I finished my freshman year of high school, I went on a mission trip with Teen Missions International to Uganda, East Africa for 2 months. Life was normal and my parents trusted their children.

As for people supporting my parents' choice of religious lifestyle, they had other families in the area that home-schooled and eventually they had us going to church an hour and a half away (3 hours round trip every Sunday) so that they could be in a church with "like-minded believers." This meant families that home-schooled, believed in parent led courtships, female submission and male headship, ultra-conservative Christianity, etc.

Before diving into this religious sub-culture, our family's beliefs were commonplace within mainstream Christianity. We went to a non-denominational church, my mom taught Sunday school and my dad was part of the church ministry. My family was tolerant of other sects within Christianity.

I wasn't attracted to the organization at all, but my parents were. I was 14 at the time so I really didn't have much of a choice since I was still a minor. My parents saw other families that looked perfect on the outside and "godly" and they wanted the same thing. My dad has always been kind of an all-or-nothing type of guy so when he went into things, he dove in head first. This subculture of Christianity was no different. He saw children that obeyed without question, women and girls all in long dresses, boys in button-down shirts, seemingly peaceful families sitting all in a row in church and people claiming to live "according to the Bible" and he decided that he wanted that, too. What he had in a normal church-going family wasn't enough. He wanted more.

A big part of this subculture includes home-schooling and family-togetherness. While those sound good on the outside, it's very different than what most people would view those on the outside of this subculture. Home-schooling in this subculture is done because they believe it's the only right way to educate Christian children. They also view a "biblical worldview and biblical education" more important than a traditional education of all the different traditional subjects.

Family togetherness is all about children not being out of the "shadow" of their parents. Since this subculture believes that everything a child should know about the world and how to live a "godly life" is supposed to be taught by the parents, children are discouraged from being by themselves or with other peers. Rather, they are kept under the constant watch of their parents. We really didn't do a whole lot outside our family. We would go to another family's house for lunch after the church service and "fellowship." There were times when we went to the homeless shelter in the city and my dad would preach there and my dad, sister and I would sing hymns together for the people in the shelter.

While my family became close over those years and we spent time with other families within the movement, it added more loneliness to my life. I think for the rest of my family, it brought them some happiness, but because I was against the lifestyle and movement, it added stress, loneliness and frustration to my life.

Right from the beginning, even at 14 years of age, I knew something was wrong within the group. When my father told me that my sister, mom and I would no longer be allowed to wear pants or shorts, I knew something was terribly wrong. To me, it was controlling. It just went downhill from there. Women weren't allowed to wear make-up, cut their hair, get a job or get a higher education. My father even made my mom, sister and I cover our heads at all times, except when we were sleeping. Women were inferior to men. I knew at the beginning that all of this was bull crap.

I tried to voice my opinions to my parents but quickly learned that any dissent was punished and nipped right away. I took to writing in my notebooks and journals, but eventually those were found by my father snooping through my room when I was 15 years old. I was "made to repent" and then my father took my journals, put them in a can in the backyard and lit a match to them and I had to watch them burn to ashes. After all of my friends being chased away by my father and no longer having a written outlet, the only way I could process my thoughts was to talk with my grandparents when I had the chance and to let them pile up inside.

I talked to my maternal grandparents and a few friends from high school but eventually, I wasn't able to talk with my old friends from school because my father wouldn't let them come to the house and phone calls had to be done within ear shot of my parents. Letters from friends also had to be read by my parents to make sure my friends weren't a "bad influence on me." I had hidden some letters from friends inside the clothing of some of the Cabbage Patch Dolls I kept on the shelf in my room and my father even went through all of their clothing and took those letters out. There was absolutely no privacy and everything was subject to investigation. That pretty much left my grandparents and they were my saving grace back then. They were my only source of sanity.

My decision to leave the group came when my parents decided that they didn't like the church my now-husand went to. I was 20 years old and they insisted that I cut off all communication with him, even though they had approved the relationship 10 months before. My sister was also "courting" my now-husband's brother. I had tried to leave home a year before that (before my husband and I became a "courting couple") but my parents locked me in my bedroom on the second floor. At 20 years old, I was tired of being played as a pawn in my dad's life agenda nd decided he wasn't going to tell me who I could and couldn't marry and he could no longer control me, an adult.

It took me a year to leave from the first time I attempted to leave when I was 19 years old. A year later, my husband called me and told me that he was going to come and get me and 5 days later, he showed up after coming from Pennsylvania to Vermont where I lived. He proposed and we left 2 days later. I had to work up the courage in 5 days, but it was something that had been building in me for years. I just had to wait until I was legally an adult. Even after I turned 18, the bondage was still there and it was very strong. This movement strips you of your strength, resolve and courage.

My sister also got engaged the same weekend I did and she also came to PA. My father and youngest brother followed us to PA the next day and urged and begged us to come home. We were told how sinful, immature and unrepentant we were. My mother told me over the phone that I was a disappointment. My parents had people sending us letters telling us the same things and how much we were breaking our family's heart.

My parents refused to let us talk with our younger brothers for a year and they refused to come to our weddings. My father threatened the leaders in my husband's church that if they supported or attended our weddings, my father would go public and expose them. In my father's defense, the church my husband grew up in was a William Branham cult, which he has since left about a year after we got married. My father also called around to area churches to tell the pastors not to marry us and that we were "living in sin," even though my sister and I were living with friends and we did not sleep with our husbands until our wedding nights. My father refused to even acknowledge our marriages for almost a year, due to believing old Mosaic law that he believed gave him the right to "disallow the vows of his daughters."

For a while, I toed the party line so that I could stay out of trouble. In reality, what this movement did was stifle my own spirituality because it was pounded into us that our parents knew best what God's will for our lives were. They tried to take the place as mediator between us and God. Rather than being "Spirit-led," which was also taught to us before we got into the movement, my parents insisted that we be "parent-led," while wrapping it all up in shiny Jesus-paper to make it look like it was God's will but it was all my parents' will instead. The scriptures were misused and used against us.

It has been a work-in-progress to go through healing. I'm not completely there yet. I've been writing my story out as well as using scrap booking as a form of creative therapy. My scrapbooks also serve as a way to tell the story of my life to my children. After coming to a head with my battle with depression, I've started seeing a therapist recently and I'm also on antidepressants.

My life is very different now. I hardly ever wear a dress or skirt, unless I'm in a wedding and that doesn't happen often. I have dreadlocks now where that would have been seen as rebellious and ungodly back then. I'm a vocal women's rights activist and my kids are in public school. My husband and I have an egalitarian marriage. I consider myself a liberal Jesus-follower and a biblical feminist. I do still have times that I grieve for my lost teen years, especially as my children are getting older and they're able to do the things that I had ripped away from me. It really is a feeling of loss and grief and years down the road from when I left, I'm now realizing I have to deal with this in a new way.

We attend a United Methodist church now, which is very open and non-judgemental. We've been going there for 9 months and it really feels like home to us. We had been previously going to a Baptist church for almost 9 years but left last June due to the pastor taking a stance that men are in authority over women and making the belief in his interpretation a "salvation issue." While we are going to a Methodist church, we don't consider ourselves to have a label. We follow Jesus and look to emulate his message of love and compassion to others while still speaking out against the injustices of abusive belief systems.

My husband is a huge support for me. Since I'm still healing from the spiritual abuse, there are times when I'm an emotional mess and he's always there to hold me when I cry, to listen through my frustrations, to help me through the grieving process of the teen years that were stolen from me. I also have some wonderful friends that are a big support to me, even though we live miles apart. We call and email and chat online and keep in touch through LiveJournal.

My kids are now 11 and 12, but over the years, we have taught them to think for themselves, to make their decisions based on how the outcome will effect them and others and that when it comes to their spirituality, it is between them and God and no one else. My husband and I tell them stories from when we were in spiritually abusive churches so they understand how damaging those groups are. We are teaching my son that women are equal to men and both genders should be treated with equal respect. We are teaching our daughter that she has just as much worth as men do and that she should never allow anyone to discriminate against her simply because she's female. We are teaching both of our children that it is good and right to stand up for their rights as equals.

If you are going through what I went through there is something you can do about it. Find someone outside of the abusive movement/organization/group you are part of to talk to. It's important that you have someone you trust on the outside as they provide an objective view to what they see you going through and can be there to help you when you have the courage to leave the abusive situation you're in. Never let anyone else's situation or pain invalidate your own. Your pain is something you own and no one else and it's okay to acknowledge it as it's one of the first steps in finding freedom and healing.

Read More Understanding Spiritual Abuse

Read More Recovering From Spiritual Abuse

Sunday, March 27, 2011

REBUILD: Letting Go Of The Past

I had to take a break from cleaning. Although I've moved around so much that I couldn't imagine keeping up with so many things, I had a lot to throw away. These papers and books and momentos were things I had collected since I was a pre-teen.

I found:

My highschool essay to be admitted to the journalism program
Old report cards from my sons
A journal I kept before blogging even existed
Old paychecks
Old awards from writing in highschool and college
Pictures from my elementary school graduation
Pictures from when my sons and I got our first 2 bedroom apartment
Love letters from past admirers
Letters from when I was trying to get court dates for child support

I laughed at most of the stuff, realizing how far I have come but then I realized, here I am at a brand new beginning and none of these awards or essays or pamphlets matter now.

What did all of this "stuff" really mean?

It means I spent a lot of time trying to become who I wanted to be. I found a pamphlet that I made when I first thought I was qualified to be a speaker. It was called, Design For Destiny. I smile now as I look over my resume from back then.

I also found a pamphlet I made back when I was in college and pregnant with my second son. I was so angry and so hurt over my break up with their father that I had to do something with that energy so I pushed it into creating a resource and inspiration pamphlet for women who were pregnant and considering abortion. I called it Surprise! It's a Miracle. I made it to encourage women who were considering abortion because they didn't believe they could handle the responsibility of a child.



I had a thousand copies made and I drove around my college town distributing them in every women's center I could find. I left a stack at the abortion clinic too. I even started visiting shelters for pregnant teens and hung out and encouraged them too.

One day I was at home hanging out with my son when I received a phone call. It was a man who was a representative for a pro-life group on campus. He told me that he loved my pamphlet and asked if he could distribute it around campus. I gave him permission but I had no idea that he would send it to over 42,000 people!

They wrote a story about me and my pamphlet on the front page of our school newspaper. I was blown away! During my last semester of school I entered a magazine design class and a young lady recognized me from the news story and she said, "Are you Te-Erika Patterson?"

"Yes," I replied.

"Hi. I'm Melissa. I want to show you something."

She fished around in her bookbag and produced a key ring. On her key ring was a picture of a little girl.

"This is my daughter," she said. "I want to thank you for making that pamphlet because when I saw it I was pregnant and then I knew that I could handle it. Thank you so much."

I was overwhelmed with joy. I couldn't believe it. Something I created had impacted someone's life!

That's what I live for. I don't know why. I don't know why I have the heart to serve others like I do. It's like a compulsion. I'm driven. I can't sleep sometimes trying to think of ways to serve others.

And all of this time I've just been hammering away at my goals, making videos, writing articles, trying to help in any way I can but it seems that I can't help myself. I'm consistently low-income. I am consistently on food stamps. Ramen noodles has been a staple in my diet for years.

Working as a waitress at Red Lobster and Denny's was my saving grace while I was in grad school. =) ~singing~ Food, Glorious FOOD, hot sausage and mustard!



I guess I'm saying all this to say, all of this HAD to be for something. Although I have nothing to show for it, I'm still reaching out to you. I created this site and I'm trying to make it bigger and trying to reach as many people as I can so they can get the help and the leg up that has eluded me.

So tonight I went through my past. I threw away all of the term papers and research and love letters and photos and cards from over the years and I threw them all away. Ofcourse, the bags dropped and split open as I carried them outside.



Goodbye old me. I'm proud of you no matter what. You tried. You didn't give up. You set goals and you accomplished them and you experienced life on your own terms when no one else agreed. You tried your best and I am so proud of you.

Somehow I feel like this Project is going to be the beginning of the next phase of my life- whatever that means.

Recovering From Spiritual Abuse

Dear Readers,

From personal experience I understand the inner workings of spiritual abuse. It begins slowly and is truly understood once you leave the abusive situation. This week we will share stories of women who have survived spiritual abuse.

I am a survivor. I do not define my life by that experience but it has left a permanent mark on my spirit. I joined a group of radical young Christians when I was an undergraduate. I loved this group because they represented the family that was absent from my life while I was away at college. I was a young college student and a mother and I wanted to belong to something that would ensure that I wouldn't make mistakes in life. I needed answers. I needed guidance. I desperately wanted to be approved and shown the way. I looked around at so many families in church and I felt that they were the perfect representation of success. I wanted that life too. I reached out to them and they accepted me. They cared for me. They taught me. They walked with me hand in hand, teaching me. They called it discipleship. Their teachings were very different from mainstream churches but the basic premise was that because God had led me to this spiritual family, I should submit to their authority and only then would I be okay.

I began to notice the signs that my former church was spiritually abusive once I decided to leave and move back home. I was done with school and ready for the next phase of my life. My Pastor told me I needed counseling before I made the decision, pastoral counseling of course. When I refused he said I was being immature and leaving the covering of their authority.

Spiritual authority? Who came up with that idea?

There is no man, woman, pastor or child who is capable of guiding you in life better than you are capable of making the best choices for yourself. The reason why spiritual abuse is so rampant is the fact that we are taught from birth that we are dirty, sinful creatures and that we need something or someone outside of ourselves to save us from ourselves. We seek approval from spiritual leaders and instead of serving our spirit or a higher power, we become servants to them.

I have watched as my friends made decisions based only by what their pastor advised. These same friends advised me to do the same. "You better go find someone who can hear from God better than you!" a friend once told me. This statement, along with another friend who told me, "There are different levels in Christ, wait until you get on my level," completely pushed me away from organized religion.

While I am a firm believer that everyone should have something to believe in, giving away your personal power to believe you can make the best decisions for your own life will lead to spiritual abuse.

Unless you are forced into a spiritually abusive situation because you are under aged and have no choice but to obey your caretakers you have the right to walk away from anyone who says they are in charge of hearing from God for you.

But some of us want to give away our power because we don't want to take responsibility for our lives. We hand our power to those in "official" positions because we desire to be good and righteous, we want to have the best lives yet we have no idea how to ensure that will happen. We follow others, hoping that their way will become the "right" way for us too. When we begin to think for ourselves we see other choices but if the choices are not agreed upon by the ones we respect the most, we fall in despair because we don't trust ourselves and their opinions mean everything to us.

You know you are in a spiritually abusive situation when:

1) Someone says they are your authority and can hear from God on your behalf.
2) Your decisions are not your own and must be approved by an official or group of people.
3) Your spiritual group believes they are the chosen ones, set aside from all others in your belief system.
4) You determine your self worth by how your spiritual group feels about you and your decisions.
5) You are told not to associate with other members of society who do not belong to your group.
6) When you try to leave you are shunned or harassed or told that you are walking outside of the will of God.

Why would anyone succumb to spiritual abuse? It's simply a lack of trust in the ourselves. We should trust ourselves more. We feel like we can't make the best decisions for ourselves but we can. The ability to transform our lives into what we want it to be lives within us.

We don't believe we are able to trust that small, inner voice so we don't sit still and listen. We only think that others who are more holy or appointed can hear direction, but we are wrong. There is no need for a middle man to assure us of our path. We need not seek approval. We give our power away when we believe that anyone has the authority to tell us what we should do with our lives. Our spiritual leaders are their to affirm us and not map out every step. Our spiritual leaders should direct us toward listening for our own guidance when we feel we have lost our way.

We have ears to hear but we don't use them because we have been trained that we are not worthy to reach understanding within ourselves. This is not true. The truth lives with you and in you. The answer is the force helping you to breathe. You breathe the power of this inner guidance every day in every moment. Trust yourself. You know the way.

Take a look at this week's feature stories.

Cindy, a spiritual abuse counselor shares insight on the cycle behind the abuse. Read here

Erika tells her story of being raised in a spiritually abusive environment and gathering the courage to walk away. Read here


Both of these stories were shared so that if you are not content with where you are, if you feel like something is wrong with what your leaders are telling you, if you even feel the slightest nudge to get away you will know that you can survive.

Everyone's life journey is unique and should be respected. There is no way that I can guide you or tell you what to believe. I do know that when it's right, it feels right. When something is true, there is no control. When someone truly loves you, you do not have to do things their way all the time. They respect and trust you to make the best decisions for your lives and they support that.

Find a group that feeds your spirit and empowers you. Find a place to grow where you can be yourself and not judged and corrected at every turn. Who knows what tomorrow will bring, our beliefs can change at any moment due to any number of influences. As for today, I choose peace of mind over anything else anyone could offer.

In Love,

Te-Erika

Share

Twitter Delicious Facebook Digg Stumbleupon Favorites More

 
Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...